London is hotter than Brazil! And to be factual, London is all the time hotter than some elements of Brazil, as a result of Brazil has some giant mountains and extends hundreds of miles into the southern hemisphere (the place it’s presently winter). However let’s not let information get in the way in which of a extra normal reality, which is that Britain is typically hotter than Africa! It’s additionally typically colder than Moscow! And that’s how climate works. However the essential level is that when it’s colder than Norway (assuming Norway is having a comparatively heat spell), some individuals get free cash. Ought to an identical system not exist for the summer season?
The Winter Gas Fee is a tax-free £200 that has been given to all pensioners every winter since 1997. Winter Gas has a pleasant ring to it; it suggests a puffing, red-cheeked septuagenarian carrying an armful of logs by way of the snow, and a few bureaucratic Wenceslas stopping to cheer them together with a pleasant little cheque. It’s a profit some pensioners do sincerely want. However thousands and thousands of different recipients don’t want it, and in a rustic that’s forecast to spend £175bn on pensioners’ advantages this yr (in comparison with, for instance, £5bn in advantages for youngsters), there may be an argument that it won’t be the perfect use of the nation’s funds. However when the federal government tried to take away it from all however the poorest pensioners, it met with livid opprobrium from the wood-burning courses and was compelled right into a U-turn that may value £1.25 billion a yr. Labour’s personal backbenchers insisted the cost was needed, having been horrified by the impact that means-testing the cost had on their social gathering’s efficiency within the native elections.
However now it’s hotter than some elements of Australia, most likely, and this means a coverage concept: having determined that the nation’s pensioners – greater than three million of whom reside in a family with belongings over £1,000,000 – actually do want an additional £200 within the winter, those that argued for a common Winter Gas Fee ought to now contemplate whether or not a summer season air-conditioning subsidy can also be wanted.
In any case, sizzling climate is successfully a wealth tax. The employed might spend their days in air-conditioned workplaces (or the ocean, in the event that they’re a marine biologist). The place do retirees go when it’s baking, they usually’re not on vacation? Sainsbury’s or Waitrose, in fact – each are Baltic right now of yr. However the further time one spends gliding their deliciously cool aisles provides as much as a lot extra purchasing. At residence, Victorian homes are notoriously poorly insulated, and the backyard should be hosed every day. The most affordable Dyson fan is £250. Fever-Tree is £2.25 a bottle. Why isn’t the triple lock taking all these further bills into consideration?
It’s not a lot to ask. Pensioners who’ve paid their method by way of society, or really feel that they’ve, are certainly entitled to a Summer time Cool Fee of £200 per family, or £400 if they’ve to make use of the Central Line. Simply £200 may pay for a month’s provide of Evian facial spray, a pair of linen trousers and a type of neck followers that appears like an enormous pair of headphones.
And it’s not just like the more and more excessive climate brought on by local weather change is in any method the fault of right this moment’s retirees, is it?
[See also: In defence of Lord Hermer]